Resilience is the ability to bounce back after a set back. It's the ability to not only keep moving forward, but to grow as you walk through a season of adversity or change. And if you have been in ministry for any length of time, then more than likely, you have faced adversity. Sometimes the set backs are small. Perhaps your 4th Grade Small Group Leader, who is fully engaged with the kids each Sunday, suddenly announces she is moving. Other times, the set backs are huge. For example, there is a change in leadership at your church. Several months in, you realize that the vision you are carrying does not align with the vision of the new leader. The question is not if you will face situations like these, but how you will walk through them. How resilient will you be? Resilience is natural for some people, but it is also a leadership trait that we can learn and improve on. The people you know that appear to be resilient likely have a combination of traits, skills and resources that help them manage set backs. Consider these factors in the resilient leader: Inherited Traits Genes matter. Some people are born with a P.M.A. (positive mental attitude). Others naturally struggle with anxiety and stress. While we are all capable of becoming resilient, it's important to recognize that our genes play a role. Circle of Influence The people you surround yourself with impact your experiences. The feedback you receive from family, friends, co-workers, colleagues and spiritual leaders play a role in how you will respond to your circumstances. When you encounter struggles, it is important to surround yourself with people who will help you bounce back. Healthy Thinking What you say to yourself during a struggle is the most factor. What you think is powerful. Or as Joyce Meyer phrases it, "Where the mind goes, the man follows." Creating a healthy inner dialogue leads to a positive outlook. "As a man thinks in his heart, so he is." (Proverbs 23:7) Ask yourself:
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If you serve in Family Ministry as a small group leader, you should check out this resource. LEAD SMALL is not just an app, it is a way of viewing your role in the lives of kids and students. As a small group leader, you have the opportunity to impact the spiritual walk of each kid in your group. Lead Small helps you do that! Lead Small is based on the book Creating a Lead Small Culture (authors: Joiner/Ivy/Campbell). It covers these principles: BE PRESENT. Connect their faith to a community.
CREATE A SAFE PLACE. Clarify their faith as they grow.
PARTNERING WITH PARENTS. Nurture an everyday faith.
MAKE IT PERSONAL. Inspire their faith by your faith.
MOVE THEM OUT. Engage their faith in a bigger story.
In addition to going over these BIG IDEAS, you can record info about your kids, access curriculum, post to social media and get inspired so that you are ready for Sunday morning. Here's to leading small! You've probably heard the phrase 'let bygones be bygones'. A bygone is simply "a thing dating from an earlier time". If you are anything like me, I have an easier time letting bygones be bygones when it involves someone else. But when it comes to forgiving myself- well, that's a different story!
I know I am not alone in this struggle. Most parents I have met are genuinely concerned about 'doing the wrong thing" or making mistakes in parenting. Our fear is that if we don't get this parenting thing right, then our kids lives will be forever tainted. While parenting well should be a high priority, we also have to learn to be realistic. The truth is- we are not gonna get it all right. We are going to make mistakes. It's not a question of if we will make a mistake, but rather a question of when. We are going to have parenting fails. But you know what? It's okay. Your 4 year old pitches a fit at bedtime and you feel like screaming. Your 8 year old brings home a bad grade and you overreact. A relative says something snippety to you and you snap back in front of your child. If you failed to handle a situation in the best possible way, learn from it. Give yourself a chance to think through the incident and decide how you could have handled your emotions in a healthier way. But don't beat yourself up. Apologize if need be. But move on. 1 John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." There is power in being able to forgive yourself. God expects us to bring our messy parenting mistakes to him. He not only forgives us, but restores us and allow start each day anew. Say good-bye to bygones. “All the king’s horses and all the king’s men can’t put the past together again. So let’s remember. Don’t try to saw sawdust.” (Dale Carnegie) Recently I entered a contest to win tickets to #OC14. Using pictures and limited words, we were asked to 'show' how we are partnering with families. Regardless of whether we win or not- I just couldn't resist sharing the entry! In January, Lifepoint took a huge step in their walk with families. We featured a two week "Playing For Keeps" series. We prepared for this series by introducing our families to the Legacy App. Our hallways were lined with photos of cuties like this one -------> Brad Barbour (youth pastor) introduced the concept of TIME MATTERS. He spoke of time over time, love over time and words over time. The following week, we began our service with Child Dedications. We wrapped up Playing for Keeps with a message about stories over time, tribes over time and fun over time. The teens in our kidmin worship team got the crowd up to their feet & in on the fun! |
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